Are you sick of experiencing failed relationships? Are you wondering why you can’t find true and lasting love? While the answer is different for many, there are a few things you can do to make sure you find a great partner with whom you will be able to build an amazing life. Let’s take a look at the 5 most important tips for building as close to a perfect relationship as is humanly possible.
Compatibility
Compatibility is a tricky word. In many cases, it’s true that opposites attract, but in these cases, there still must be some kind of common interest in spending time and doing things together. Sometimes it’s easy to confuse compatibility with pathology. It’s not uncommon for women to seek men like their father (however unhealthy that relationship may have been) or for men to seek women like their mother (again, despite the health of the mother-son dynamic). This can be a dangerous hunting ground, especially if your relationship with your parent(s) led to feelings of shame and self-hatred.
One of the best ways to find true compatibility is to take advantage of online dating. With online dating, you have the opportunity to get to know a person’s thoughts and character over time through safe conversations online.
Once you finally find somebody you share a connection with, and you decide to meet and take further steps to building a lasting relationship, here are a few more tips to consider.
Honesty
Honesty is one of the fundamental building blocks of a healthy and loving relationship. It’s not just honesty as far as practicing monogamy that’s important, but also honesty in your feelings and perceptions. If you get in the habit of agreeing with your partner all the time even though it’s not a representation of your true feelings, resentments begin to grow and will come out in the future in awful ways. A relationship should be a give and take in which both sets of ideas and interests are considered.
Understanding and Acceptance
People will not always see eye to eye on things, but if they stay open to other peoples’ perceptions and points of view, fights can be avoided and a couple can have a logical and civil discussion – or even debate. Remember, it’s possible for two people to disagree and still both be right.
Self-Examination
Being willing to look at yourself and examine your behavior is key in any relationship. Do you consider your partner’s needs? Are you unfairly impatient or too demanding at times? Could you call or send a text more often throughout the day to let your partner know you’re thinking of him/her? Continuously looking for ways to be a better partner is a great way to make sure love stays alive.
Boundaries
Every relationship will have disagreements and possibly even fights, but they don’t have to get nasty. Remember to always fight fair. That means: No name-calling, no cheap shots, no using a sensitive topic that was shared with you in confidence as an emotional dagger, and nothing physical. Remember that every time an argument escalates, it establishes a new boundary of what is acceptable in that relationship. Do you want your relationship to allow hatred and mistrust to abound, or would you rather build something loving and meaningful?
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